Calm and settle your little one with these tried-and-tested techniques

Learning to read your baby's signals can keep the calm before the storm

From conception to birth, your baby’s needs are taken care of by your body. But, once born, they suddenly have to shout – quite literally – to have their needs met. With no placenta to satisfy their hunger or womb to keep them warm, your baby’s cries are a way of communicating with you.

Dr Penelope Leach, author of The Essential First Year (Dorling Kindersley, $29.99) says that during the first six weeks of its life, expect your baby to cry a lot. 「This may be due to hunger, a dirty nappy or, sometimes, simply because he hasn』t yet become used to being outside your body and so he feels vulnerable,」 she says.

But don』t worry, there is plenty you can do to help them feel secure, calm them and stop those tears.

1. MASSAGE

Baby massage is well known for helping calm a baby, and is a great way for both mum and dad to bond with their bub. Use a simple oil – like sweet almond – and, in a warm and comfortable place, gently massage your baby using upward strokes. This can be done either before or after the bath, but if your baby has sensitive skin you may need to rinse off the oil after the massage.

Amanda Hart, 32, says when her eight-week-old daughter Lucy is grizzly before bed, she rubs organic baby lotion into her legs, arms and body. 「Lucy seems to enjoy it, as she always stops fidgeting,」 Amanda says.

2. BODY LANGUAGE

Learn to read baby’s movements and you』ll be able to stop their cries before they become inconsolable. Child and family health nurse Sharon Donaldson says understanding your baby’s cues and behaviour does take time.

RELATED: Decode your baby's cries

「Trying to think clearly when your baby is crying can be challenging,」 says Donaldson. 「If your baby is hungry, he will begin to root around with his mouth and tongue and turn his head towards your breast. If he’s not hungry, he may simply want a cuddle, or he may be tired and struggling to settle to sleep.」

Babies may have reflux, which can worsen at times, but if they continue to scream during or after a feed, or is very difficult to settle to sleep, Donaldson suggests you talk to your GP or early childhood health nurse.

3. PAT BABY』S BOTTOM

Unborn babies are comforted by the sound of your heartbeat, which is why newborns love snuggling against your chest. And this rhythm may be why patting a baby’s bottom is so soothing for them, too. Donaldson says that gentle patting, in the rhythm of a heartbeat, on either the back or bottom will help make them feel secure.

Baby slings can mimic a womb-like environment for your baby – they feel close to you and benefit from the rocking as you walk.

Alison McGough, 29, mum of Freddy, four months, says sometimes the only way she can get her son off to sleep is by holding him against her and walking around the house while tapping his bottom. 「At first, I thought the pressure would stop him from falling asleep, but the rhythm actually seems to send him off,」 she says.

4. FINE TUNE IT

Research shows babies are calmed by sounds, such as music or voices that they recognise from the womb. Beth Arkwright, 31, mum of Barney, seven weeks, says when she was pregnant she listened to Mozart.

「After he was born, I bought the Baby Mozart CD and Barney really responds to it,」 she says. 「Every evening, I put it on after I』ve fed him and when I』m transferring him into his bassinet. If I』m struggling to settle him after a night feed, I put it on again and he usually drifts off.」

5. CREATE NOISE

Yes, you read that right! Babies love white noise, such as a hairdryer on a gentle setting, again because it reminds them of the womb. A baby has spent quite a while in this noisy environment, with your blood flow whooshing past him and your digestive system gurgling, says Donaldson – and all while he’s been growing and floating in water.

Ruth Moss, 27, who’s mum to Joe, 11 months, says the chatter of the radio worked well when she was struggling to settle her son. 「I even started putting it on during nappy changes, so he』d lie still,」 she says.

Another way to recreate a womb-like atmosphere is with the Sleep Nurse, $99, which is a nightlight and plays a range of scientifically developed soothing sounds, including a womb-like noise.

6. BUY A CARRIER

Some babies won』t go to sleep unless they』re being held, which can be a problem when you』ve got chores to do. One way to get around this is to carry your bubs in a baby carrier or sling.

As well as being convenient for you, it can be soothing for your baby. Donaldson says baby slings can mimic a womb-like environment for your baby. They feel close to you, and benefit from the rocking feeling as you walk.

Make sure you choose a style of carrier you can put on easily, as you don』t want to be fussing around with complicated instructions when your baby is tired. You may also find your bub prefers one style of carrier over another.

If you join your local Sling Meet, you can speak to other mums and try wearing different designs. Visit www.slingmeetsaustralia.com to find an event near you.

7. BABY-PROOF YOUR SURROUNDINGS

「Babies are very aware of their environment, so make your bub feel safe at home by keeping his surroundings calm,」 says Donaldson.

Amber Wood, 29, found too much light unsettled her five-month-old baby Gabriel. 「Whenever I bathed Gabriel, he always cried, until I realised the bathroom had excessively bright lights,」 she says. 「So I changed to a lower-watt bulb and he immediately started enjoying the bath more. The calmer atmosphere is a good way to settle him down for bedtime.」

WHEN A NEWBORN WON』T STOP CRYING

If your baby’s still struggling to settle, it’s time to seek help...

Phone a friend: Gather your family or a friend for support, so they can mind bub while you sleep or have a bath. Listening to a crying baby all day is exhausting, so accept help whenever it’s offered.

Walk away: Put your baby in his cot and let him cry while you go into another room, focus, collect and calm yourself and take a few deep breaths. Hand baby to dad if he is around at the time, sometimes a new person or voice is all that’s needed to change the mood and soothe them.

Visit the doctor: There may be a medical reason why your baby is inconsolable, so seek professional advice if you are really worried.

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